Blindsided, despite my best efforts

The company I work for has been threatening layoffs for the past year. We've been very fortunate not to go through any while many other companies in our business have. I've been preparing that whole time for the worst, knowing that my bosses have had plenty of problems with my work over the past few years even if I seem to be doing better. I've thought about how I'd react, where I'd look for work, whether I'd go back to school, whether I'd move home and even how I'd break the news here. If it was going to happen, I was not going to be caught with my pants down.

Word came Tuesday that the layoffs were beginning. A few people I'd worked with briefly lost their jobs, and that was upsetting enough. We thought the layoffs would be done by the end of the day, but because I work for such a large company with offices in many far-flung areas it took an extra day for bosses to reach all the people affected. On Wednesday afternoon I got a phone call from my boss, who said he was looking for my other boss to hold a conference call with me. I was in sheer terror in the hour or so it took boss one to find boss two.

As it turned out, I was not getting laid off. My job title was changing a smidge, which without getting into details, was a good thing and something I'd been wanting for a while. It was something that they'd been dangling over my head with the charge of 'do better work and you'll get this better job title.' It didn't really mean a change in responsibilities or extra money, just a source of pride and a more logical chain of command to report to. I was thrilled.

And then yesterday afternoon, boss one showed up in town, sent me home for the day and laid off my officemate. My only officemate. The boss sat there while officemate cleaned off his desk and the 20 years worth of stuff that had accumulated on it.

It's hard to convey just how big of a deal this is without the context of what I do, but it's a big f'ing deal. If the company bosses wanted to punctuate their layoffs with an exclamation point!, they did it. Officemate is the best at what he does. He has knowledge no one else has. He does the work of many people. Losing him means a glaring hole in the work my company provides. Never in my wildest thoughts of who all might be in danger of losing their job did I think that the company would ever get rid of my officemate.

I've lost my therapist, confidant and right hand. There are days during my slower season when he's the only person I see or talk to for eight hours on end. During my busy times, he helps me with my work. I try to help him with his, but usually have a hard time of understanding what he works with on a daily basis. And despite being a technology-savvy person, I can't ever work our phone system and always manage to break the fax machine. He always fixes it. He drove me crazy from time to time, but was still always the type of person I'd prefer to be confined with in a windowless office.

Not to mention this means a huge, huge change for my responsibilities -- one that I never saw coming. I am now a one-man band, left to do the work of about three or four people. I can barely keep my head above water as it is, and I certainly never wanted these additional responsibilities. I don't want to complain because, yeah, I have a job and I should be grateful. I'm grateful for the income for sure, but sometimes I resent it for what I and my colleagues across the country have to put up with to earn it.

I'm absolutely devastated for him. In not wanting to compare it to a death, I'll say it feels like a breakup. Like THE breakup. It ended without warning and has left a gaping hole. I'm sad, I'm angry, I'm lost. But like THE breakup, I'm amazed at the outpouring of support from friends and coworkers -- and I wasn't even the one who got laid off. He's the one that needs the support.

And since I always feel the need to make a point, my point is this: life can turn on an instant. And it will never turn the way you expect it to or plan for.

Free chocolate

It's been an emotional week at The Modern Gal's place of employment, which I'll get into later. But still, imagine my delight when I saw an e-mail pop into The MG's inbox earlier today announcing 'free Godiva chocolate.'

Umm .. yes, please.

Apparently November is 'Truffle Month' and to celebrate, Godiva stores are giving away a complimentary truffle from their new Legacy Truffle Collection. You can also get $5 off your purchase of $25 or more all day long. I don't know much about the Legacy Truffle Collection, but the PR pitch claims it features Godiva's most iconic and delicious truffles, hand-selected by the company's chef chocolatiers. I don't know what a chef chocolatier is, but I'm pretty sure I want to be one.

And on the occasion of 'Truffle Month,' here is some truffle trivia:
-- Approximately 17 million Godiva Truffles are sold each year
-- Approximately 47,254 Godiva Truffles are consumed each day
-- 1,969 Godiva Truffles are consumed every hour
-- 33 Godiva Truffles are consumed every minute

Now go forth and eat chocolate ... free chocolate.

Etsy: Charm Design

The Modern Mom is starting to pester me about giving her a Christmas list, and I really don't have a clue what to ask for this year. Maybe everything on Etsy is a good place to start?

Speaking of Etsy, Etsy has holiday gift guides up now. Check them out.

And also speaking of Etsy, may I share with you a lovely purse which I bought through Etsy from a seller I would recommend 10 times over.

Because I'm on the go quite a bit for work and must carry pens, pencils, notepads and small electronics in addition to my usual wallet, personal items and cell phone, I've been carrying the following bag for a long time. I like it because it's functional with tons of pockets, can be adjusted in about a dozen ways for size and comfort and slips across my body for comfort and security. I've had this bag for years, and even after switching to new bags I always seem to come back to it. But it's falling apart.


I was itching to replace it with something a little more stylish, but the bags I've had my eye on that are big enough, pocketed enough and stylish enough all seemed to weigh about 100 pounds. So I started trolling Etsy, when I discovered Charm Design.

I love the style of Charm Design's bags, but even better are the fabrics and prices. I decided I wanted the pouch with a long (removable) strap to fit across my body, but I was worried about the lack of pockets. And the big bag with the across-the-body strap didn't come in the fabrics I liked the most. So I e-mailed the seller, who agreed to make the bag I wanted in the fabric I wanted with an extra pocket and divider inside, all for the same price. For $2 more, I got a short strap which I could easily switch out with the longer strap to make it a shoulder purse if I wanted to go out.

The end result was such:


I love, love, love this purse, and the seller was so incredibly easy to work with. She made the purse after I ordered it, and I still received it in a bout a week. Please everyone check out her shop.

A Saturday night in the life

This is my first Saturday night off in ages. You'd think I'd live it up and party until my legs fell off, right?

Negatory, Ghost Rider. I haven't even make it to the usual '80s dance party at the neighborhood bar.** The Modern Fella and I went a little lower-key and hit the local English-style gastropub, a glass of bitters for him, a glass of wine for me. We've been sitting at the bar seen below, telling stories, listening to the live easy-listening band playing on the other side of the bar (currently playing: Something by The Beatles ... one of my top-five favorite Beatles songs) and, umm, downloading apps on our iPhones. Because we know what's important in life.



In other news, there's finally an app that lets you post to Blogger from your iPhone. This could be bad. Or good, depending on how you look at it.

**Ok, ok, so we still ended up at the neighborhood bar after an extremely early last call at the gastropub.

Carpe annum

Editor's note: I did not take Latin. I have no idea if I translated the title correctly. Please advise if you know Latin.

One of my best friends here in Knoxville is one of those amazing souls that are hard to find. Around this time last year she took a good hard look at her life and realized she wasn't living it. She was down, she rarely got out, she felt boring. So she decided to throw a party for a few of her gal pals and a couple of other gals she didn't know well, but thought she might get along well with (myself being in the latter group). It was a perfect mix of people. We ate well, thanks to her, and we joked and laughed and talked about serious matters and left that evening with a renewed spirit.

Our hostess was only just beginning. Her next 12 months were spent taking in life. She dined at good restaurants, she checked out every cultural event possible, she went on trips -- if someone was around, she brought them along, but she didn't wait for anyone to accompany her either. She gathered people at her home, she called on people when things were wrong, she played wingwoman when it was needed (and sometimes when it wasn't :).

I stole this photo from Modern Jigsha. I hope she doesn't mind.

When my last relationship fell apart in January and after all the initial offers of sympathy were gone, she was the one to keep checking on me and get me out of the house. She urged me to join her at the '80s dance club on a regular basis. She took me on a spur-of-the-moment road trip when I found out a guy I was interested in didn't feel the same. She pushed me into giving the now Modern Fella a chance when I wasn't sure I was ready to date again.

So when she threw another party this week to mark the year that had gone by since her first party, I committed to going, come hell, high water or inconvenient work schedule. In fact, everyone returned. And the stories we all have are amazing. New loves are in our lives, new hobbies have been taken up, one gal got married, one gal rejected an asshole that needed to be rejected.

But everyone still had the same spirit that they left with a year ago.

I don't know anyone who gets more out of their life now than Modern Jigsha gets. I wish everyone had someone like her in their life, but to those of you who don't -- be that person in your friends' lives. MJ has touched so many of us, and we're all better for it a year later. You could do the same.

Let there be light recycling

I am horribly late in sharing, but check out my monthly post at The Greenists on The Home Depot's holiday light recycling program. If you take a strand of incandescent holiday lights in to the HD by Sunday, you can get a discount on a strand of LED lights. There's also info on how the HD recycles the old light strands. Check it out!

Cookie Monster and the origin of 'Om nom nom'

My main man on Sesame Street may have indeed been the originator of the oft-used 'om nom nom' phrase. Come to think of it, he may have had a role in the origins of LOL speak too. Me can has cookie?



I posted on this a long time ago, but as a refresher: the always entertaining Om nom nom nom blog.

P.S. Happy birthday, Sesame Street!

Witnessing a random act of kindness

I received an e-mail notice that payment for my P.O box was a few days overdue, so since it was my day off and because USPS.com didn't want to cooperate with me, I decided it best to haul ass across town to both empty the box which I hadn't visited in a while and pony up the payment.

When I got in line to pay there were about four people in front of me and of course only two people working the counter. The two customers at the counter seemed to have large, difficult requests, so nothing I could do but summon up a little patience and wait.

Not a minute after I'd joined the queue, a 30-something lady with came in with what appeared to be a 2- or 3-year-old kid. And the kid was screaming. The kind of screaming that makes me doubt any past or future desires of mine to ever procreate. She kept telling the kid in a menacing tone to 'be quiet,' but of course he didn't listen. That's when her phone rang, and she answered it. He kept screaming while she chatted for a moment. He kept grabbing her keys, she took them away, he wailed, she finally decided to hang up and focus on trying to keep her kid quiet. I did my best to stare straight ahead and fight a grimace that kept creeping on my face.

That's when the lady in front of me, probably in her 40s and now in the front of the line, smiled and turned to the other lady and said, "You can go ahead of me."

"Really? Are you sure?" the other lady asked with clear gratitude on her face.

"Of course. I have three kids, I completely understand."

It was then that I first felt A. doubly irritated, then B. in awe of the older woman's kindness and C. completely ashamed of my own reaction.

I was ashamed that I thought of nothing but my own irritation at the lady and her son and then had a brief moment of irritation at the older lady allowing the younger one to skip both her and me with her gesture. The younger lady was obviously struggling with juggling her son and her daily errands and a simple act of kindness from a stranger that cost the stranger nothing but an extra two minutes of her time appeared to make the woman's day. Why couldn't I have opened my heart like that?

And then something even more wonderful happened. When the woman and her son approached the counter, the boy stopped wailing. Instead, he started chirping, "Hi! Hi!" to the counter worker and anyone else whose gaze he could catch. He was smiling, and with every "Hi!" he drew a chuckle from those in the post office.

CYOB: Time to get spooky!

This post is part of NPW's Choose Your Own Blogventure, Spooktacular edition! If you got here from Definitely RA, keep reading. If not, visit NPW for the beginning and hopefully you'll get here eventually.

(Eds note: If you read this post between the hours of 9 and 11 a.m., I had the links screwed up, so read again!)
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I looked at Julie. Her gaze was fixated on the trunk, and she didn’t appear to have noticed the book sitting on a table next to one of the armchairs. I knew I had to grab the book. If I couldn’t watch the rest of Haunted Happenings, I could at least read the rest. Plus, it would be so much less scary without the images of the trunk that seemed to be torturing Julie.

I yanked Julie’s hand and pulled her toward the entrance of the library set up. She followed me, still distracted by the sight of the trunk up ahead. I began to hear the sound of a thumping heart. It grew louder with every step we took. I looked toward the gramophone as we approached it and saw two glowing red spots just beyond it.

“CA-CAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWW!”

“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!” Julie and I screamed in unison as we were met face-to-face with a black object with glowing red eyes that had lunged from behind the gramophone.

We collected our wits in about 30 seconds and realized the thing that was staring us in the eyes was a fake but realistic looking raven perched on the end of a long stick. Holding the other end of the stick was a man with shaggy eyebrows, a shaggy moustache and wavy hair. He was wearing a long black coat and gazing upon us with an amused look.

“Ohmygod, he looks JUST LIKE THE PROFESSOR!” Julie said in the loudest whisper I’ve ever heard.

“You half-wit scaredy cat burglar! He’s supposed to be Edgar Allen Poe!”

Julie shot me The Look as I grabbed her arm and pulled her further into the library.

As we passed the armchairs, I grabbed the Haunted Happenings book. It felt hollow and made a rattling sound. I couldn’t look inside yet, as we were still encountering characters. Along the way, Dante popped out from the center of the fireplace, and Lovecraft’s Cthulhu had been hiding near the chess set.

Finally we made it to the door. I opened the book to see what was causing the rattle. It was an ancient iron key, just like the one Annelise had held in her hand in the movie. The glow of the porch light made the key sparkle, which pulled Julie’s gaze away from the trunk.

“What’s that?”

“It’s ... it’s ... it’s a key,” I responded.

“Ohhhh, no, no, no, NO!,” Julie said. “Let’s just knock on the door, get our candy and get the flip OUTTA HERE! ... Wait, no. I changed my mind. Let’s just run. I don’t need the candy. I’m too old for this shit anyway.”

“No way, I’m not leaving here without my candy at the very least. Besides, I want to see if there’s more haunting inside the house. And, I’m still curious about the trunk.”

If you think Kate and Julie should try to open the trunk, click here.
If you think Kate and Julie should knock on the door to get candy, click here.

Why smile when you can wink?

Some inspiration for your Thursday which I found inside a bathroom stall at a bookstore: